Six months into a deployment and my nerves are shot! I lack patience, organization and crave time to myself. I find myself questioning my credentials for being a parent and wanting to knock out non-military wives that complain about the simplest of tasks! Yes, six months in and all I can think about is how the heck am I going to make it through these next six months when somedays I'm not sure I can go another six minutes before I blow a gasket! It is so easy to get down and out and overcome with anger, self-pity and bitterness. It is also very easy to take it all out on the little people. To many times I have taken my frustrations and anger out on my children. Too many times, I haven't taken the time to see how this must affect them and how they just need a little bit more of me. More of the mom I always claim I could be if my second half were here. Too many times, I have gone to bed and thought, "Wow Jacqui, way to handle that one!"
Yesterday while cleaning the house, I came across a piece of paper with this verse on it,
And the King will answer and say to them, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.’
Matthew 25:40
and it made me realize just how important and key my role as a mother is. It made me think about how trusting my children are of me and how much they depend on me to do the right thing. How the way I love on them, interact with them and comfort them shapes and molds them into loving and respectful adults. I choose to become a mother, God blessed me with two amazing children and my job is important! This verse reminded me that even if it takes a little more patience, a little less sleep, a little more laughter or a little less free time, it matters. It matters to the Lord and it matters to my kids!
